You Can Never Have Enough Quotes

You Can Never Have Enough Quotes

Having the right caption for a picture can really help tell your story. Of course journaling is one way of doing this, but many scrapbookers like to use quotes. And as far as I’m concerned, you can never have enough quotes! Here’s a small collection of funny quotes to add to your scrapbooks.

Funny Quotes : You Can Never Have Enough Quotes

 

Funny Quotes – “Shorts:”

  • A computer once beat me at chess, but it was no match for me at kick boxing. (not a clue!)
  • A good sermon should be like a woman’s skirt: short enough to rouse the interest, but long enough to cover the essentials. (not a clue!)
  • A man in love is incomplete until he has married. Then he’s finished. Zsa Zsa Gabor
  • There are no stupid questions, just stupid people. (not a clue!)
  • I have met a lot of hardboiled eggs in my time, but you’re twenty minutes. Oscar Wilde
  • A verbal contract isn’t worth the paper it is written on. Samual Goldwyn
  • A man’s only as old as the woman he feels. Groucho Marx
  • Love is like a booger. You keep picking at it until you get it, then wonder what to do with it. (not a clue!)
  • I’m very pleased to be here. Let’s face it, at my age I’m very pleased to be anywhere. George Burns
  • I am so clever that sometimes I don’t understand a single word of what I am saying. Oscar Wilde
  • Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side, a dark side, and it holds the world together. Oprah Winfrey
  • The large print giveth, but the small print taketh away. Tom Waits
  • Income tax has made liars out of more Americans than golf. Will Rogers
  • Girls are like phones. We love to be held, talked too but if you press the wrong button you’ll be disconnected! (not a clue!)
  • Never go to a doctor whose office plants have died. Erma Bombeck
  • Everybody wants to go to heaven; but nobody wants to die. Peter Tosh
  • Ask me no questions, and I’ll tell you no lies.Proverb
  • If your boss is getting you down, look at him through the prongs of a fork and imagine him in jail.David Brent
  • Is that a gun in your pocket, or are you just glad to see me? Mae West
  • The only reason people get lost in thought is because it’s unfamiliar territory. Paul Fix
  • It’s not true I had nothing on. I had the radio on. (nude calendar picture) Marilyn Monroe
  • A man in the house is worth two in the street. (not a clue!)

 

This is one of my favorite quote sites. It’s well organized and fairly easy to find something just right.

 

 

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